The Verdict

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As everyone knows not, the verdict is in from the Casey Anthony trial, and the news is not good for those who believe that this woman literally got away with murder.
However, here in America, we have this thing called The Constitution. This document essentially guards the rights and freedoms of all of us, and while it sometimes results in less than optimal results, such as in this case, its merits far outweigh its downfalls.
It isn’t much of a stretch to realize that even if she didn’t kill her daughter, and even if she didn’t have a hand in covering up a tragic event, she is most definitely guilty of being a horrible mother, a liar, and a woman whom few could possibly be proud of for having as a daughter. The fact that we were not on the jury is probably of little satisfaction, except to realize that these people were faced with a difficult task. Not having the evidence to be able to prove that the child, beyond a reasonable doubt was murdered, they did what was required of them.
For those who believe in a higher power of some sort, there is some satisfaction in knowing that Casey Anthony will, at some point, get what is due her. For those who don’t have that belief, I hope that they can somehow bear that this woman will be walking around free. I suspect that she will get little peace, no matter where she goes, and it would be difficult to be a friend to her.
Someday…

Flowers

Lynn and I took flowers up to the cemetery the other day. This was something that obviously, should have been done closer to Memorial Day, but with him having been sick, we had just not gotten around to it. The day before, Andrew, Baylee, and I had carefully transplanted them from the flimsy pots they came in into sturdier cemetery pots.
There are two cemeteries in town, so we stopped first at the larger one, depositing the plants on the graves of Lynn’s grandparents, two aunts who died as children, and great- great (at least) grandparents. Then we went on to the smaller of the two, putting the flowers on his parents’ grave, and some more grandparents.
In each of the cemeteries, we tend to wander around a bit. Lynn heads first toward the older section, where seemingly endless generations of his family are scattered about. He can trace his roots back about a million years, so it seems that he is related to nearly everyone in town on some level. I, on the other hand, have no relatives buried anywhere, as far as I know, and certainly not any buried in this town, in which I have resided a mere 30 some years. I am a relative newcomer. I generally start out in the newer sections, catching sight of the graves of people I knew, but had forgotten were buried where they are. This day, I came across the grave of the mother of one of my fourth graders from a few years past. She had gone to the hospital one day in May, was diagnosed with cancer a week later, and passed away in July, buried on what would have been her 39th birthday. Flowers and trinkets on the base of the headstone reminded me that her 12 year old daughter had just endured another Mother’s Day without her, and it made me sad.
Eventually I strolled into the older section, making note of names that we rarely hear these days – Homer, Erastus, Arminta, Gladys. I wonder about these people who lived in a simpler time than we do now. Maybe not better, but surely simpler, with fewer distractions.
Every year when we take care of the graves and flowers, I vow to do this more often. I realize how peaceful and pleasant it is to wander through a cemetery, making connections with past, and each time I do, it reminds me that life is really just a fleeting moment in time.

On Teaching

I got a nasty note from a parent the other day. I guess we all get them, but I am never prepared for them, and I always feel immediately as if I am to blame for having done something terrible to a child. I never have, but I do know that there is a sense of "us against them" between some of the parents and the teachers who spend many hours of their day with their children.

It shouldn't be like this. Contrary to popular belief, teachers do not lie awake at night thinking of ways to torment their students. I happen to know that we lie awake thinking of ways to reach them, and we lie awake worrying about them, and we lie awake wondering if what we are doing is working, but torturing and tormenting them? No.

I understand that parents want what's best for their children, and they want their children to be in an environment where they are cared for, nurtured, and loved. But to be honest, sometimes these are heading in the direction of being oxymoronic. Many parents want their children to be successful, but they aren't prepared for what that particular child needs to be successful. Some students find schoolwork easy, have no problems with the time frames allotted to them, get along well with others, and come to school each day well-rested and fed. Others don't. Some have difficulty learning certain things, balk at doing certain tasks, work more slowly, don't come with school supplies, don't get enough sleep, and come to school hungry. Some children have chores at home, realize they aren't the only child in the world, accept responsibility for their actions, and understand that appropriate behavior is expected at certain times. I can tell how children talk to their parents by the way they talk to me - even if they deny it, and I have a hard time understanding how any parent would allow their child to be disrespectful to them.

Children need so much in order to be successful in the real world. While teachers are supposed to focus on academics, there is often so much to be overcome before we can get there.

I just wish they would cut us some slack.

Busy Life

Life is so busy these days. My first year of teaching third grade is coming to a close. My grandchildren are growing up. My husband has been sick, but is slowly getting better. At work, all of the usual end-of-the-year things are made more evident by the haste with which they need to be addressed. End of the year TPRIs; end of the year ORIs; Math Profiles; Reading Profiles; Cleaning out folders; packing away wall hangings; Filing paperwork; attending meetings; and meetings; and meetings, etc.

We had our field trip the other day, what an awesome time we had. A ride on "The Miss Buffalo", a boat that took us around to look at the cityscape. Unfortunately, due to the extremely windy weather and turbulent water, we were unable to go through the locks, something we had looked forward to. "But you said we would", said one of my students. Amazing to think that he expects that I have the capability to plan the route.

Blogging

I have found that, unfortunately, I don't get to this blogging task often enough. My last post was about the birth of Benjamin, and since then, when I got home, I have been dealing with a very sick husband. Two days after I arrived in Buffalo I had to take him to the emergency room - that was early in the morning of Easter Sunday. By Monday evening, he was in the ICU at Sisters Hospital in Buffalo, where he remained for 6 days, then in a regular room for 3 more days.

When he came home (after a suggestion that he go to rehab instead), he has been on oxygen and IV meds, still exhausted most of the time, but slowly but surely (very slowly) making progress.

It has been an eye-opening several weeks, in many ways. We came close to losing him, and even he realized that he really almost didn't come home. I have learned that I can do many things that I did not really know I could do - mowing the lawn for example, and learned a few valuable lessons. The garbage cans do not automatically sprout little legs and walk themselves up the driveway.

Some of the things that were more important have become much less so, and my gratefulness that he is home has not diminished. I discovered that there are many, many prayer chains and prayer lists in our community, and that in a small town where most people know each other, or at least know of each other, a short trip to the grocery store resulted in having several conversations about his progress.

I am grateful for our family, this town, my friends, my colleagues, and my church family. Thank you all.

Baby Benjamin

April 11, 2011. Today our 6th grandchild, Benjamin Michael, was born. It is no less exciting than when Tyler, grandchild no. 1 was born, 8 ½ years ago, but what a long way we have come! Though we rarely see the 3 in New Jersey, and I suspect we won’t see this one as often as we’d like, our daughters are very good at keeping us up with what’s going on. Facebook, email, and Skype will be of immeasurable use to us, and I am so looking forward to watching them all grow.
While I wish all my grandchildren lived nearby, I am very fortunate that 2 of them do, and that we get to spend a great deal of time with them. They spend a night or 2 a week at our house, I am invited to the playground and spray park with them, and we are all very close.
So, Benjamin, welcome to our world, you beautiful baby!

New York's Population

I have to say I thoroughly agree with Froma Harrop in a recent editorial. The loss of population in the state of New York is a very good thing. Since most of us complain mightily about too many people everywhere we look, it seems only fitting that we should receive that news favorably.

I haven’t done any research to determine what kinds of people have left the state, but it seems like a win-win situation no matter how you look at it. If, by chance, the people moving out are welfare recipients, then all the better. If they are gainfully employed, then that leaves openings for more who remain, or those who would like to move back.

There really are some good things about fewer people. Things like more parking spaces; the ease of getting a doctor’s appointment without waiting 4 months; less traffic at rush hour; shorter lines at the grocery store; etc.

While I am sure that not all leave because of the job market, there is no doubt that the job market around here is tricky. Many of our family members and friends have experienced the gamut of frustration. Good jobs have been lost, health insurance has been non-existent, and times have been lean. However, if you work at it, these things can be overcome. Some have found low-paying jobs to tide them over for a bit, which is not always a bad thing. Character-building and all that. Some have lowered their expectations for being wealthy, and settled for being content. Some have gone back to school to make themselves marketable in a completely different field. Some have moved away, and yes, it’s sad when those who move away are your own kids, but if they really wanted to stay, they would find a way to do it. Maybe they’ll come back.

I suspect a lot of people use the job issues as a stepping-stone to the fact that they don’t like the weather. While I am not a huge fan of cold weather, I much prefer the occasional snowstorm to hurricanes, tornadoes, mudslides, volcanoes, 100 degree temperatures, and floods. With snow, we know what to expect.
As to the political backlash concerning the red vs blue states, let’s stop caring about that so much. Maybe if we do, we’ll get to the point where we worry more about what political candidates say and do than what party they belong to.